Have you ever been in a relationship that feels like something out of a film in the beginning? You can’t believe your luck: you’ve found someone that makes you feel like you’re floating on cloud nine and is saying all the right things.

But slowly you realise that the promises they make to you never materialise. They set you up with grand expectations but never truly live up to them. Or they say they’re going to give you the world but double back at the last minute.

It’s a confusing and frustrating experience that Stylist has termed ‘sandcastling’ – the relationship may seem grand and impressive from the outside, but upon closer inspection, it becomes apparent that it’s built on shaky ground. It can feel a bit like emotional catfishing, where consistently someone builds up your hopes and expectations only to let you down. There’s not only a lack of follow-through and inconsistency in actions and words, but an overall sense of instability. The castle is made of sand.

Have you fallen victim to ‘sandcastling’ in your relationship? Here’s how to tell