Money

The cost of living crisis has no doubt affected everyone but single women have been facing additional costs that put them under financial strain when compared to those in relationships. Household costs are higher for single people as they’re paying more for rent, to heat up their homes, to use the internet and cook meals. In fact, people living on their own spend an average of 92% of their disposable income compared with two-adult households that spend only 83% of theirs, according to the Office for National Statistics. A huge cost for single people is council tax. At the moment, people living alone in the UK can claim a 25% discount on their council tax but this means you’re still paying 75% of the bill. When compared to two or more adults living together, this is significantly more expensive – people living alone pay an extra £516.24 per year.

It isn’t just household bills. Transport is also expensive for a single woman, whether that’s car insurance or paying for public transport. For couples, if you catch the train, you can get a two-together railcard for discounted fares; if you drive, the travel cost is effectively reduced as two people are in the vehicle.

Housing

Most of us have probably dreamed of having a place we can call our own – somewhere we can style, decorate and call home. A few decades ago, buying a house used to be just another life stage in adulthood, but with soaring house prices, mortgage rates and stagnant salaries, it’s now much more of a dream than a reality. And for single women, that dream is even further away. Compared to being able to share a house deposit and a mortgage with a partner, getting on the property ladder alone is no easy feat. The Women’s Budget Group found that women need over 11 times their annual salaries to be able to buy a home in England, while men need just over eight times. So, if you don’t have a high salary or additional help from family, the likelihood of being able to afford to buy a home is minimal.

And this leads us to the world of renting. Due to the UK’s housing crisis, the rental market has seen rapidly soaring rental prices, fierce competition for properties and more people living in house shares for longer. According to figures from the Office for National Statistics, private rental prices are sitting at a record high, increasing by 5% between June 2022 and June 2023. Many single women may enjoy living in house shares but this can change as women get older and want to live in their own space. However, renting alone has become an unaffordable option for many people in recent years, but it’s especially difficult for single women. The Women’s Budget Group found that there is no region in England where private rented housing is affordable based on women’s average earnings.

Work

Then, there’s the workplace. Single women may find that their personal lives are devalued compared to that of a partnered or married person and experience higher workload expectations because they’re seen as more available and flexible. “Single people can feel utterly alone in their financial responsibilities, without a partner’s income or support. Along with added financial pressures, single women can feel pressured to work more and have more availability and financial flexibility,” says Charlotte Fox Weber, psychotherapist and author of What We Want. Expecting single women to answer emails or calls at all hours, work extra hours and cover for colleagues because they don’t have partners or kids can take its toll and likely lead to disillusion, stress or even burnout.

Leisure

However, it isn’t just housing and work, single women are being priced out of leisure activities and their social lives. Last summer, one London restaurant upped its minimum spend for solo diners and the single supplement still exists for many hotel room bookings, making spending time alone expensive and inaccessible for many. Even simple things such as going to the cinema, accessing entertainment subscriptions like Netflix or visiting an English Heritage site is cheaper if you sign up for memberships with a partner. And yes, single women could make more sacrifices – we don’t have to go on holidays or go out for dinners – but when you’re single, if you don’t make plans or arrange to see your friends, you end up at home and alone.

Friendships

Navigating singlehood can also affect our non-romantic relationships, especially as those around us enter different life stages. From having fewer social opportunities to feeling excluded or lonely, being a single woman can be an alienating experience. “There can be a fear of not belonging, being the odd one out, not wanting to impose. When friends are in different life stages there can be a sense of shame and guilt in asking for support, and it’s easy to suffer in silence and drift into disconnection,” explains Fox Weber. Repeatedly feeling like the odd one out can affect self-esteem and self-worth, making a single woman feel undervalued or overlooked.

As well as feeling excluded or left behind, single women may feel a sense of having to uphold an image of the entertaining social person or the professionally successful one. This is something I’ve experienced in my own life where partnered friends will come to me for gossip because singlehood is more ‘interesting’ or there’s an underlying assumption that I’m always free to hang out. “The token single friend can become a persona that’s more performative than open and vulnerable,” says Fox Weber.

From money to friendships, this is how hard it is for single women right now