“I almost turned down a job offer in financial services, which gave me a significant pay rise, because a compressed nine-day fortnight was refused. I decided to take it and figure it out later, which was a stressful start. 

Workplaces need to get better at properly scoping out what’s required and senior staff need to parent out loud. By that I mean show what’s possible, like leaving early for sports day or creating realistic and effective working patterns around childcare hours.”

Sam, boundaries coach, mum of two children

“When I had my second child I’d been running my gardening business for two years. I had a handful of regular clients and I was trying to do it all – keep the business going, breastfeed, raise my son – without telling the clients for fear they would go with someone else with less baggage or boobage.

I often asked for power to be left available to me to use the mower – more important than ever, now I also needed power to be able to plug my breast pump in for a quiet 10 minutes’ pumping. On one occasion I arrived at a garden, it was raining and the client had left the power cord so that it didn’t reach outside and short their fuses. They left a note to say to reach through the cat flap and plug in there.

My breast pump cord was only about a metre long, so I had to crouch in the rain on the back doorstep, totally exposed, with my breast nearly poking into the cat flap, while it ugh-ugh-ughed away, pumping the precious milk. If I’d felt comfortable communicating my needs to the client, the whole thing could have been avoided.

Open communication in the workplace is essential. There isn’t just one rule when it comes to parenting – clubs change each term, children get sick or have appointments… But it also might be that you want to go on one of the school trips for once or help set up the summer fair.

If your team can see diary commitments but also be aware that those dates are flexible, there’s much more scope to fulfil parenting duties, while also getting paid to do the job. This creates a trust and respect and feels like we are all pulling together.”

Seonaid, gardener, mum of two children

“I’m a teacher and I know that there are a lot of workplaces with a guilt culture if you need to take time off because of childcare issues.

Even jobs, like teaching, that traditionally appeal to women with children because of summer holidays, may no longer be that appealing. That’s because a regular week can be exhausting due to the long hours, so getting your half terms off may not attract women to the profession as much as it used to.

Employers need to take the lead when it comes to creating a shift in work culture and mentality. Flexibility within the workplace should be based on the belief that flexible work equals a happy employee, and not an employee who is trying to ‘get out of’ work. 

This applies especially to traditionally more rigid jobs like teaching where the timetable is set for the year and you have to ask the head teacher if you can attend events such as your child’s school play.”

Beata, teacher, mum of two children

“The main problem for a lot of working mums is facing unrealistic expectations. These may be external expectations, like having meetings scheduled at 7pm (a solicitor mum told me that she knew if she pushed back then it would be ‘career limiting’) or clients WhatsApping during maternity leave (it happened to me) or internal expectations – putting pressure on yourself to do what others can.

The main thing an employer can do is to ditch the expectation that nothing’s changed. Mums have been through so much emotionally, physically, hormonally and financially – the expectation to act like nothing happened results in masking, which is a huge mental drain.

Faking it and suffering in silence only makes things worse, as colleagues continue to expect you to act like nothing’s changed and you become increasingly isolated. Ultimately, mums won’t feel good enough and have to adopt the behaviours of those without kids rather than being authentic to their own situation.”

Leila, entrepreneur, mum of triplets

“One of the most impactful ways workplaces can lighten the load for working mums is by offering better wellness programmes.

Providing dedicated wellness days can give mums time for self-care, reducing stress and preventing burnout. By supporting women’s health beyond just flexible hours, workplaces can empower mums to thrive, both professionally and personally.”

Stefanie, CEO, mum of two 

“I’m happy to say I’ve been one of the luckier ones when it comes to juggling parenting and work: before I had even left for maternity leave to give birth to my second child, my management team were quick to offer me a range of options for returning when I was ready. 

“These included going down to a four-day work week or working slightly longer hours across four days to keep my salary – all to ensure I could get that vital day with my little ones at home. This was laid out to me before I even had to ask, which took away the stress I would have otherwise felt in having to broach the conversation with my employer, and I went on leave with a clear head, knowing my plan of action for when I was ready to return. 

“Now I’m back at work with a four-day flexible working week, which has definitely gone some way to help – and I’d urge other employers to support working mums as much as mine did.” 

Ellen, operations administrator, mum of two