Starting a new job is a strange, chaotic time. You’re meeting a load of new people (and desperately trying to learn their names), attempting to suss out all the office politics, getting up to speed on the basics and adjusting to different ways of doing things – all while you try to make a good impression and show your boss they were right to hire you. 

That ‘trying to make a good impression’ routine can mean you say ‘yes’ to everything. You want to show you’re a team player and a hard worker, so you feel like you can’t turn down any request. 

That’s a major mistake for one simple reason: it sets you up for failure. 

The simple truth is you can’t do absolutely everything – at least not without the sacrifice of your mental wellbeing and your personal life. That’s why it’s vital that the moment you land a new job, you’re super clear about your boundaries so you set clear, reasonable expectations and won’t spiral into damaging patterns before you can spot them settling. 

“Starting a new job is the best time to set boundaries, because you have a clean canvas to start as you mean to go on,” Subira Jones, a corporate burnout prevention consultant known as ‘The Corporate Hippie’, tells Stylist.

“Oftentimes when we set boundaries with people who have known us for a long period of time, there is an adjustment period, where we have to get comfortable with having boundaries and those around us have to adjust to the ‘new you’. This adjustment period can make or break your new boundaries because it takes effort to consistently enforce these new boundaries.

“However, when you start a new job, the ‘new’ you is simply YOU. Your new colleagues do not have to go through that relearning phase, as they do not have a past point of reference.”

Essentially, it’s much, much easier to start off with the correct boundaries in place than it is to try to go back and change what people expect from you. We’re not suggesting, of course, that you laze about for your first month so your co-workers’ expectations are at zero – that might result in you failing your probation. Instead, it’s about striking a healthy balance from the get-go. 

What that looks like is up to you. It can help to have a think about your previous role and what parts of it weren’t working for you. What would you like to do differently this time around?

“A new job can be a fresh start and a chance to think about some of the past things you didn’t say no to,” notes career happiness mentor Soma Ghosh. “For example, in a previous role you may have worked outside your working hours, or even taken work calls when you shouldn’t have.”

Some examples of boundaries to set at work include protecting your lunch break as time away from your desk, not checking emails outside of your working hours, having set times for deep focused work without distraction, or leaving on time every day. Perhaps a boundary for you is being able to skip a meeting that throws your whole day out of order, or requesting that any time a task comes in, it needs a clear explanation of its priority level. 

Jones says: “The purpose of having work boundaries is to help you work at your optimum. Ask yourself: how do I need to work to excel in my new role?”

Once you’ve worked out what boundaries you need around work, it’s time to put them into action. How do we do that?

Request plenty of handover and induction sessions 

When you join a new workplace, you should be given plenty of clarity around what you’re expected to do. If that isn’t happening, make sure to request it. 

“They shouldn’t expect you to come in and know everything straight away,” says Ghosh. “It’s important to have some level of this formality in a new job so that you understand more about the organisation and what’s expected from you, as every workplace is different.”

Know that it’s OK to say ‘no’ – but be ready to offer an alternative 

Saying ‘no’ can feel scary, especially at a new job. It can help to explain why you’re saying no and to offer an alternative. For example, if your manager asks you to do something with a deadline that’s too tight, you could say something like: “I really want to make sure I do my best on this, and I think it needs more time invested to really make it shine. Could I get this to you tomorrow instead?”

Or say someone invites you to a meeting at 6pm when you’re supposed to finish at 5pm. You could say firmly, but politely: “I actually finish for the day at 5pm, but I can see on our calendar that we’re all available at 2pm on Wednesday – could we reschedule for then?”

Communicate what you need 

“The best way to set your boundaries is to communicate them explicitly,” says Jones. “One example is sending an email to your team and stakeholders, introducing yourself, saying how much you are looking forward to working with them and how best you like to work.

“Example: I find bullet points the best way to digest information. If you would like to have a meeting with me, please send me an email with the meeting subject in the invitation. Please feel free to send me a message on Teams if you would like to have a quick conversation.”

Be consistent 

Make sure you actually stick to the boundaries you’ve set. “If you have set hours, make sure you are turning your work phone or work laptop off and not responding outside working hours,” recommends Ghosh. 

Take ownership of your time

You’re an adult. You should be trusted and empowered to prioritise tasks and organise your own calendar to enable you to deliver your best work. 

A good way to do that? Time-blocking. 

“Create time blocks in your calendar, giving flexibility to priority meetings and politely but assertively push back on the non-urgent meetings to ensure you are getting your breaks and carving space to work on deliverables,” Jones suggests. 

Know your worth

We can’t know for sure, but you’re probably very good at the work you do – there’s a reason you got your shiny new gig. Make sure you remind yourself that your value is not in staying late every day or saying yes to every ask that comes your way – you have so much more to offer. 

“Often when we carry out these feelings of not ‘working hard enough’ it’s because we are told it’s a badge of honour to work hard,” says Ghosh. “But what about producing good quality work and working smart? 

“Know that you are working properly and are efficient but are also not wasting time while at work. You shouldn’t feel guilt or looked down on if you know your work has good feedback and supports others to do their job too.”

Let the quality of your work speak for itself, knowing you don’t need to work to a state of burnout just to ‘prove’ yourself. 

Remember why you’re doing this 

For times when you feel like wavering – when you’re tempted to just say ‘yes’, to bend over backwards, to people-please – remind yourself why the boundaries you’ve set matter. 

“You implemented the boundaries to ensure you can work at your full potential while protecting your wellbeing and not burn out,” Jones explains. “While burnout is not an occupational phenomenon, setting boundaries can prevent us experiencing it.

“Setting and enforcing boundaries increases our sense of autonomy, helping us feel like we are in control of our lives, which is great because one way of preventing burnout is retaining your personal power and self-efficacy.

“Setting boundaries also adds a sense of purpose – after all, we only protect that which we care about. Working with purpose increases our motivation to keep pursuing our goals, eliminating the feelings of pessimism.

“Setting boundaries, such as time blocking and not always being on ad-hoc calls, can help us better manage our workload, giving ourselves both the time to execute the deliverables and take the necessary breaks we need to stay productive.”

Images: Getty/Stylist