“My boss isn’t particularly toxic, just very unpredictable. They could be right as rain when you come into the office in the morning, yet by midday their mood has shifted and you’re walking on eggshells. When it comes to working together, I never know which side I’m going to get: the fun, supportive one or the severe, strict one. Do I have to just accept that this is what they’re like sometimes?”

Unpredictable behaviour from any colleague is challenging but when it’s your boss who’s volatile, life can become very stressful. Walking on eggshells, keeping your head down, steering clear… suddenly these become your ways of being and the pleasure you normally gain from work inevitably takes a nosedive.

So much depends on what is causing your boss to behave so haphazardly in the first place and that’s difficult for you to discern. Is it the pressure of their job or could it be something more profound, such as a problem at home or even a mental health issue? My first instinct is for you to try gently reaching out. If they’re feeling isolated, they might appreciate a simple act of kindness. A relatively innocuous approach would be to say something like: “Hey, I was wondering if you need anything. You seem a little stressed. I’m happy to help if you would like me to take on anything extra?” This way, you’re showing care but without overstepping. If a heavy workload lies at the root of your boss’s mood, maybe this offer could relieve their tension.

However, I fear your boss has underlying problems that won’t be solved with a reduced workload. Your gentle concern could even land you in dangerous territory, where you run the risk of receiving a temperamental response from someone who seems to lack control of their emotions. Plus, you could end up with a ton of extra work that you won’t be able to deliver. This could snowball into your moody boss becoming even more aggravated.

A safer way to cope with your boss’s unpredictable mood swings is to switch your focus onto yourself. In other words, prioritise what you can control and ignore the things you cannot. So the next time your boss is having an erratic episode, practise a form of mindfulness. This will involve you observing what’s happening around you but without reacting to it. Instead, concentrate on your own specific role and personal projects, ignoring any chaos being caused by your boss.

With this focused effort at mindful concentration, achieving a state of serenity will be easier than you might imagine. By directing your mind to your own productivity, you will gradually lose sight of your boss’s instability. If you manage this successfully, you’ll discover the satisfaction of being responsible only for your own moods.

You’ll know you’re succeeding when you stop being negatively affected by whatever is occurring around you. Inner peace is gained by knowing you’re in control of your emotional composure. Withdrawing from the office dramatics is the key. With time, your boss’s moods will become irrelevant to your own, and that is the secret to surviving a mercurial leader. Good luck

Images: Getty