Welcome back to Stylist’s Sleep Diaries, where we take a deep dive into one of the most important (and elusive) factors in our day-to-day lives: sleep. To help us understand more about it, we invite women to share their habits with our sleep expert Dr Nerina Ramlakhan for analysis.

Age: 23

Occupation: Barista.

How much water do you drink on average per day? Five glasses.

How much caffeine do you drink on average per day? Usually two or three cups of coffee, matcha or tea.

What time do you wake up in the morning? 5.30am.

What time do you go to bed at night? 10pm.

How often do you exercise? I run three times a week and go to an exercise class once a week.

Do you eat breakfast within 60 minutes of rising? Yes, I eat it almost immediately.

I moved to London a couple of months ago, and my sleep has been all over the place ever since. I spent several months last year barely sleeping due to anxiety after finding out my mum had an incurable illness, and while my anxiety has now improved and I’m sleeping a bit better, I struggle to maintain a sleep routine and often struggle with shallow sleep filled with vivid dreams.

My dreams are almost always nightmares and often play on my worst fear – spiders. My house being filled up with spiders is a common one, but I’ve also dreamed about being hunted or being hurt (often stabbed) by an unrecognisable figure, which leaves me feeling awful. I also grind my teeth, so even when I don’t have nightmares, I’ll wake up with a lot of pain and tension.

Struggling to adapt to the light and noise in the city is certainly one reason for my issues, but I don’t think it explains them all. I go to bed and wake up at the same time every day (I’m an early riser due to my job as a barista) and try to exercise regularly. I do freelance work after my day job, so I often work in the evenings but try to make space to wind down before bed by doing some skincare and reading in bed with an oil diffuser and some ASMR on in the background.

I’d like to learn more about how I can have a more regular sleep schedule, and stop my anxiety from disrupting my sleep in the form of nightmares and tooth grinding. How can I regain control? 

“I suspect your nightmares and teeth grinding are related to your worries about your mother’s health and the recent move to London. Dreaming gives us the space to consolidate and pack away the information we take in during the day, but it also helps us to process difficult emotions and feelings. 

“The fact that your dreams are so vivid and disturbing, and are tapping into your worst fears (arachnophobia) could be an indication that you’re struggling to cope.”

She continues: “While you have some good lifestyle habits and a fantastic wind-down routine, you could do with more support to help you manage the worry and anxiety that’s spilling over into your nighttime. I suggest you look into getting some talking therapy or even some form of holistic therapy such as acupuncture or EFT (emotional freedom technique) to help bolster your resilience.

“It might also be helpful for you to follow a regular pre-bedtime journaling practice to help you offload some of the worries you’re currently taking to bed with you at night.”

Images: Ami O’Callaghan; Dr Nerina Ramlakhan