Life is challenging at the moment. From the ongoing cost of living crisis and state of politics across the world to the fact that the weather is grim 99% of the time and we all have to-do lists as long as our arms, you’d be forgiven if you wanted to run away from it all at times. If you’ve never pictured yourself throwing in the towel on your 9-to-5 to live in a yurt in Fiji, who even are you? 

While a degree of escapism can be a healthy coping mechanism that allows us to buffer our emotions against the stresses and strains of everyday life, experts say that constantly daydreaming about a different lifestyle or frequently engaging in activities that distract us from our real lives might be a symptom of a deeper mental health issue. 

Here, we take a look at what an escapism mindset is, how it manifests, how to use it to your advantage and how to spot when it becomes an issue. 

More than a mere daydream, an escapism mentality tends to be a pattern of behaviour and thinking that allows us to transport ourselves mentally and emotionally to another place, away from our problems. 

“An escapism mindset could be defined as an established pattern of behaviour or thought that allows a person to escape the realities of life or provides distraction from everyday challenges,” explains psychotherapist Eloise Skinner. “It can sometimes be a beneficial way to deal with difficult problems or manage stress and emotions in everyday life when used appropriately and without excess.”

Along with a prolonged desire to escape to sunnier climes, typical ways that this tendency can manifest include substance abuse, social media usage, playing video games or immersing yourself in the latest boxset. While these can all be innocuous activities in moderation, issues can arise when we use these distractions to avoid real-life issues and tasks. 

“This mindset may manifest through excessive screen time, compulsive behaviours or engaging in fantasy worlds, leading to disconnection from present responsibilities and relationships,” says Danny Zane, a therapist at North London Therapy. “While it can serve as a temporary coping mechanism to avoid stress, anxiety or life challenges, managing this mindset involves recognising when escapism becomes detrimental and setting boundaries around escapist activities.”

Having the ability to take yourself on a mental journey to regroup and focus the mind in a stressful situation undoubtedly has its benefits. Indeed, studies show that escapist tendencies can have both adaptive (ie beneficial)  and maladaptive (detrimental) effects on mental health. However, the experts are clear that when a propensity for escapism switches from a useful tool to a whole mindset, this is when there’s a problem. Let’s take a look at what issues can arise. 

It can be a symptom of other issues

“An escapism mindset can be a symptom of burnout or overwhelm,” cautions Zane. “When you feel stressed or unable to cope with certain circumstances for longer periods of time, you may resort to escapism as a way to momentarily detach from emotional or physical exhaustion.”

It can impact your ability to function in everyday life

“Some people might prioritise escapist activities over necessary tasks, resulting in decreased productivity and fulfilment in life,” says Zane. If you find yourself using escapism as a way of avoiding chores or responsibilities, this can impact your work, home life and social connections. You might find yourself withdrawing from friends and family as you spend more time engaging in other, more distracting activities. 

It might be used to suppress emotions

“An escapism mindset might develop in response to more enduring challenges around mental health or identity,” says Skinner. “It could also show up in the face of conflict or particularly difficult circumstances as a way of avoiding dealing with issues.” 

Escapism can absolutely be a useful tool when used appropriately. So, how can we use it to our advantage? Here are our experts’ top tips. 

1. Take regular, mindful breaks

“Taking mindful breaks can help you to stay within your emotional tolerance, allowing you to recharge without losing touch with reality,” says Zane. “Balancing escapism with self-care can result in creativity and relaxation, and you will stay connected to your responsibilities.”

2. Address the underlying causes of escapism

“In order to use escapism to our advantage, it is important to analyse the reasons that we seek to escape from our daily lives,” says Skinner. “This may involve some kind of processing (perhaps using a tool like journaling, therapy or chatting with friends and family) to uncover our true motivations. From there, we can start to observe the pattern when it takes place.”

Zane adds: “It’s essential to explore the underlying causes of escapism to develop healthier coping strategies. Talking to a therapist can give you some insight, and tools for addressing the root issues, which can help you to take a healthy, new approach to life’s challenges.”

3. Be mindful of boundaries around escapism

Managing this mindset involves recognising when escapism becomes detrimental and setting boundaries around escapist activities. This might look like setting time aside to watch a show, play games or scroll on your phone. 

4. Be kind to yourself 

“By observing without judgment or needing to immediately change our behaviour, we can take a more compassionate approach to our own tendencies to use escapism,” advises Skinner. “Over time, we can take steps to reduce the use of escapism when we do need to face up to the responsibilities and challenges of daily life, as well as also maintaining it as a tool to help us manage stress and emotions in a healthy way.”

If you are struggling with your mental health, you can find support and resources on the mental health charity Mind’s website and the NHS’s Every Mind Matters or access the NHS’s list of mental health helplines and services.

If you are struggling with your mental health, you can also ask your GP for a referral to NHS Talking Therapies, or you can self-refer.

For confidential support, you can also call Samaritans in the UK on 116 123 or email jo@samaritans.org. In a crisis, call 999.

Images: Getty