With the return of Bridgerton to our screens, millions have tuned in globally for some bodice-ripping action. Since the show first aired on Netflix at the end of 2020, Shondaland’s interpretation of Julia Quinn’s steamy Regency romance novels has taken the world by storm. While its historical accuracy has been debated to hell and back, the show’s blend of period-accurate drama and modern sensibilities (we’re still haunted by this season’s orchestral cover of Pitbull’s Give Me Everything) has become a kind of fantastical realism that provides an escape for viewers.

As the romance genre has done since its inception, the show allows viewers a chance to fall in love through the lives of the Bridgerton siblings and the world they inhabit. It’s a far cry from swiping right and “You up?” texts or buying someone a drink and asking for their number. And yet, Bridgerton’s appeal comes not purely from its romantic fantasy, but from the ways in which the show’s love stories reflect something truthful about pursuing relationships in our own lives.

In the series so far, and its spin-off, we have seen multiple classic romance tropes play out for our ensemble: fake dating, enemies to lovers, arranged marriages, friends to lovers, forbidden love, steamy flings and marriages of convenience. However, it’s Penelope (Nicola Coughlan) and Colin’s (Luke Newton) story that is most likely to feel familiar to viewers; this author certainly couldn’t help but cringe when recalling similar realisations of feelings, and subsequent confessions, for a friend. However, whether any or all of these tropes are relatable to you, what their inclusion reminds viewers of the vast array of ways in which love manifests itself. Admittedly, the show took until its prequel series, Queen Charlotte, to put an LGBTQ+ relationship front and centre, but even in the heterosexual relationships that are front and centre, there is great contrast and variety. Bridgerton shows that love doesn’t have to look a certain way: in this season alone, Francesca (Hannah Dodd) and Earl Kilmartin (Victor Alli) sitting in comfortable silence is worlds away from Colin’s frantic confession, and what follows after, in the Featheringtons’ carriage.

This season, as Colin worked out his feelings, we were introduced to an alternative suitor for Penelope, Lord Debling (Sam Phillips). While the show demonstrated that he was unable to provide love in the way Penelope craved, and she essentially would have been an absent husband’s estate keeper, viewers couldn’t help but find him endearing, even debating whether he would have been a better match. Similarly, Prince Frederick (Freddie Stroma) in season one was kind and loving towards Daphne (Phoebe Dynevor) and Edwina Sharma (Charithra Chandran) was sweetness personified in season two. The alternative options for our leads are never (with the exception of Nigel Berbrook) positioned as villains in the story. 

Such is the case with real-life dating, too. Of course, there will be those not deserving of your love, but often, there will be multiple potential partners in a person’s life – all of whom have distinct qualities that make them appealing. If we’re thinking in terms of ‘pros and cons’, the differences are often subtle, and yet, like Daphne and Anthony and Penelope, we let feelings win out in the end. It’s our hearts that make the call, rather than an innate sense of practicality.

Even in settled relationships, there is still the realistic nuance of people regularly getting things wrong. Professional matchmaker Lara Asprey notes: “Besides all this outward exterior of correctness, behind closed doors, things were very different. People did everything to protect reputations, yet couldn’t always control themselves beneath the sheets and I think people relate to that human fallibility. There is a sense of comfort watching as you realise they are still just humans after all, and despite appearances, they still had feelings that they couldn’t control.” 

Like in real life, it can take many attempts for Bridgerton characters to find the right match. However, there is a contrast in how this is portrayed for men and women. In season two, Eloise (Claudia Jessie) found herself on the verge of societal ruin for merely spending time alone with Theo (Calam Lynch), a working-class man. Meanwhile, Benedict (Luke Thompson) has found himself with a new woman every season, engaging in everything from threesomes to illicit affairs. “The subject of sex back then was such a taboo topic that young ladies were expected to simply ‘find out’ about it on their wedding nights,” explains Zoe Burke, leading wedding expert and editor at wedding planning platform Hitched. “Meanwhile, the men had more freedom and could engage with sex workers, mistresses and more – and the parents sort of kept quiet about the whole thing, if they knew.” While Burke refers to this trend as “disastrous”, the one positive in depicting it is that our characters have a history that then informs their present. By the time we eventually get to Benedict’s season (it’s rumoured to be next) he will be able to bring the lessons learned from all his trysts and flings to his primary love story. In the same way, we learn something from each failed relationship that we can take into the next one. 

The society of the ton is foreign to us, especially in its portrayal of ‘the marriage mart’. However, Burke thinks there is still plenty of similarity. “Whether someone is married or not is no longer, quite rightly, an indication of their status; a wedding is still a cultural highlight for many,” she says. “It’s wonderful that we can get together and celebrate love and make meaningful promises, but it’s also wonderful that we can make different choices if we need to as life is short. It’s no longer a ‘cultural ideal’, by any means, but it’s still a form of security and a recognition of your relationship, which can feel important – rightfully so – for many couples.”

Dating for marriage isn’t at the same level as Regency courting, but the journey to find love hasn’t changed at its heart. The methods are completely different, but the motivation remains a desire to be known and loved. Bridgerton continues to break viewing records and appeal to more people, not just because of its sentimental storytelling, but because it taps into an innate human desire for connection. As Asprey puts it: “That feeling of being someone’s absolute world and priority is incredibly intoxicating to watch.”

Images: Netflix